Reel Tales Lodge

Fishing Jokes | ice fishing

Newsbot — Mon, 14 Dec 2009 05:14:42 +0000

Two morons were ice fishing and not having much luck.

Pretty soon a guy went by on a snow mobile and he had a whole bucket of fish on the back.

One moron says to the other one "That's why were not catching anything ,we're not trolling!"

Fishing Jokes | whats your secret?

Newsbot — Sat, 12 Dec 2009 05:14:43 +0000

Bob is sitting on the ice all day fishing with no luck, not even a nibble. Cold and tired he is about to leave, when a guy walks up cuts a hole in the ice beside him, and starts pulling out fish as fast a he can drop his hook in the water.

Bob can’t believe it, he yells over ” whats your secret?” “woogatkakeptewrwm” he answers back. “what did you say?” replies Bob. The man spits a large ball of worms on the ice and says to Bob, ” you have to keep your worms warm”.

Fishing Jokes | A sure way to get a bite on a slow day is:

Newsbot — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 05:14:41 +0000

* Talk about changing spots
* Prepare another rod while one is out
* Lay your rod down unsecured
* Go for a sandwich
* Start to pull the boat anchor
* Use the worst fly you own
* Crack open your first beer
* Crack open your last beer
* Take notice of the chick on a passing boat, bank or beach
* Watch others fishing
* Start reeling in your lines at going home time
* Give your fishing rod to a female companion or child to hold
* When your landing net is out of reach
* When you have cast your line over an obstruction
* When you line has drifted into impossible weeds
* When you turn to look at the sunrise or sunset
* Decide that you need to take a leak

Fishing Jokes | Cracked Up

Newsbot — Sun, 06 Dec 2009 05:14:43 +0000

If you re fishing on ice, you should never tell a joke on ice. WHY??? The ice will crack up!

Fishing Jokes | Fairy tales and a Fishing story’s

Newsbot — Fri, 04 Dec 2009 05:14:42 +0000

The difference between a fairy tales and a fishing story's

fairy tail begins, "Once upon a time..." and a

fish story begins, " This is true..."

Fishing Jokes | Catfish….

Newsbot — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 05:14:43 +0000

One day a fisherman drives up to the local lake for the first time to try out the fishing. He pulls up in his truck and notices a redneck unwrapping catfish purchased from the Supermarket and stringing them up one by one on his stringer. Bewildered he watches the guy as he heads down to the shore with his fishing chair in one hand and the stringer full of catfish in the other. The redneck sits his chair down lies the stringer full of fish next to the shore and nods off to sleep. Well the new guy is simply flabbergasted but goes on with his business and begins to fish. Three hours go by and he notices the redneck waking from his nap. He watches him fold up his chair and pick up his stringer full of catfish and begin heading back to his truck. The new guy not having caught much, only one tiny bass decides to call it a day too. As he heads back to his truck he walks by the redneck and decides to ask him about his peculiar behavior. Hey buddy what gives with bringing store bought fish to the lake with you and placing them on your stringer like that? The redneck replies….well this here lake only has bass in it, and I only eat catfish!

Fishing Jokes | Catching too many

Newsbot — Tue, 24 Nov 2009 05:14:43 +0000

A fisherman returned to shore with a giant marlin that was bigger and heavier than he. On the way to the cleaning shed, he ran into a second fisherman who had a stringer with a dozen baby minnows. The second fisherman looked at the marlin, turned to the first fisherman and said, " Only caught one, eh?"

rare type of fish known as “a living fossil”

Newsbot — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 02:00:37 +0000

A handout photo taken by Japanese researchers of Aquamarine Fukushima aquarium in October shows a juvenile coelacanth. Japanese marine researchers have said they found and successfully filmed a young coelacanth — a rare type of fish known as “a living fossil” — in deep water off Indonesia.
(AFP/AQUAMARINE FUKUSHIMA/File/Ho)

Young Coelacanth

You went ahead and finished your fishing trip didn’t you

Newsbot — Wed, 18 Nov 2009 05:09:48 +0000

A man was on the water for his weekly fishing trip. He began his day with an 8-pound bass on the first cast and a 7-pounder on the second. On the third cast he had just caught his first ever bass over 11 pounds when his cell phone rang.It was a doctor notifying him that his wife had just been in a terrible accident and was in critical condition and in the ICU. The man told the doctor to inform his wife where he was, and that he’d be there as soon as possible. As he hung up he realized he was leaving what was shaping up to be his best day ever on the water.

He decided to get in a couple of more casts before heading to the hospital. He ended up fishing the rest of the morning, finishing his trip with a stringer like he’d never seen, with 3 bass over 10 pounds. He was jubilant.

Then he remembered his wife. Feeling guilty, he dashed to the hospital. He saw the doctor in the corridor and asked about his wife’s condition.

The doctor glared at him and shouted, “You went ahead and finished your fishing trip didn’t you! I hope you’re proud of yourself! While you were out for the past four hours enjoying yourself on the pond, your wife has been anguishing in the ICU! It’s just as well you went ahead and finished, because it will be more than likely the last fishing trip you ever take! For the rest of her life she will require ’round the clock care. And you’ll be her care giver forever!”

The man was feeling so guilty he broke down and sobbed.

The doctor then chuckled and said, “I’m just pulling your leg. She’s dead. What’d you catch?”

Fishing Jokes | load dishwasher

Newsbot — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 05:14:42 +0000

How does the Captain of his vessel load his dishwasher?

He gives his wifey a few beers.